Quick List of Movies I Watched Recently But Don't Get Full Reviews Because I Said So

We Need To Talk About Kevin (2011) :
Great little indie psychological horror superbly acted and a nicely realized vision
Check it out.

The Devil Inside (2012) :
Cheap, lifeless, unoriginal, no fun, worthless writing, a giant middle finger endeing
Thumbs Down, skip it forever.

Hick (2012) : 
An interesting movie to say the least, an entertaining but realistic tale that manages to be interesting without going dark.
Give it a look when you get the chance.

Iron Sky (2012) :
A movie that's sucha crazy idea i had to check out turned out not to be as a big of a time suck as I thought, and managed to entertain. Its a good time at the movies to say the least.
Go see it if your into that sorta thing.

Perfect Sense (2012) :
Two of my favorite actors putting on the twistiest love story I've ever seen with apocolyptic disease elements.
Ya I kinda loved it.
Go watch it.

This Means War (2012) :
HAHAHAHAHA No it wasn't funny at all.
Never watch it.

Men In Black 3 (2012)

   I love the Men In Black movies. Well I mean I love the comics, but Tommy Lee Jones and Will Smith did a much better job then I thought possible of bringing the characters to life in a movie. And then they sorta kinda did it again, making a movie with a very similar plot but still perfectly fine and enjoyable. Id love to tell you that this one is exactly the same and bad and not worth seeing, because it feels like a cheap cash in. However, this movie is actually my favorite in the series, and its a lot better than I thought it would be.


   Set at least a few years after Men In Black 2, Men In Black 3 is about an alien that K (Tommy Lee Jones) put away back in the sixties, when he first joined the Men In Black, using time travel to change history and kill him so that in modern times there would be no K and no way to stop his armies from invading the earth. J (Will Smith) then takes it into his own hands, traveling back to sixties to stop the evil Alien (who was oddly enough played by Jemaine Clement of Flight of the Conchords) from killing K and changing history. When he goes back he finds a young K (Josh Brolin) and they team up to keep the time line the way it was meant to be. There's aliens gun fights and jokes and- you get the idea. 


   If it sounds as similar to the first movie ad the second one did don't worry, your not crazy. It's very similar. But that doesn't detract from the fact the Smith and Brolin (And occasionally Tommy Lee Jones) do a hell of a job keeping it alive. Will Smith has never been the best actor but he's good and he's funny and not too bad in the serious moments. Brolin doing his best impression of Tommy Lee Jones nails it, and really makes it feel like the same character. The action is fun without being dull or over played, the writing is surprisingly good and the story is a nice addition, if not book end, to the series. 


   Sure it gets a little sappy, and at times the humor falls flat but it's not bad if your into this sorta thing. 

The Avengers (2012)

 

   It's hard to put into words how happy this movie makes me. I never would have imaged after walking out of Iron Man that four short years later I'd be seeing him team up with all my favorite Marvel superheroes, having a massive alien punch up, spewing spectacular speeches, and DOMINATING an already superb looking summer. 


   What's the plot? A big box of who gives a damn, there's a big evil threat against earth, and all the heroes despite their differences in view and personality have to join forces and combine their unique abilities to save the planet. It's not terribly complicated. no ridiculous twists, no silly over the top romance story, just a fantastically simple set up so that a buncha dudes in costumes can fight a buncha aliens in New York. 
I'd like to step back and thank Joss Whedon for a moment. 


   Joss Whedon you are a talent, and I thank you for making the Avengers the way you did.  Because his directing is why the first half of the movie works so well; writing and directing any kind of group dynamic is tricky. He pulled it off in Firefly, and he pulled it off Buffy. Does it work here? Somehow yes.  Norse god shouts at WWII era patriotic solider who's trying to calm down a cynical scientist from antagonizing the under control but very dangerous quirky scientist who are all secretly mad at where they are and just wanna blow off steam. A scene where everyone sounds different, acts different, and looks very different plays out as one of the most entertaining groups your ever going to see on screen. 


   Besides how he pulls of the group there's no question that hes got the action down. Ya see the movie is basically two halves; Superheroes argue and fight each other while a threat looms over earth ---- then threat comes and they put asides their differences and fight as a team. And the action is just as fun to watch, as is Thor scoffing at all the puny little humans. Good choreography, good sense of geography, and a damn pretty visual aesthetic and monster design give this movie the best superhero fights of all time. 


   And don't even get me started on the acting, Robert Downey Jr. still waltzes flawlessly into every room like he owns them all as Tony Stark, Chris Evans still plays Captain America like the straight-laced perfectly good hero, Chris Hemmsworth clearly loves playing a god and bellowing out in a Nordic accent, Scarlett Johanssonn is... still doing her thing. Shes not a bad actress her character just doesn't get as much time to do both action and development as much as the others. Besides a cool little Easter egg where all of her scenes have a mirror (tee - hee i see what ya did there Marvel)  she doesn't feel important. She's great, but deserved more screen time. The two newish additions , Jeremy Renner as Hawkeye and Mark Ruffalo as Bruce Banner (the Hulk) do the characters justice. In fact Mark Ruffalo is the greatest Hulk I've ever seen. Quirky enough as Bruce Banner but clearly smart makes the dichotomy of him being the Hulk seem like a more drastic jump. I loved it. Hawkeye, not unlike Black Widow, doesn't get a lot of screen time but somehow gets even less to do. He's great and he's cool and he has the whole dark crazy thing goin on sometimes and his action scenes are all cool but he definitely deserved more time. All your other favorite characters come across as great, special mention goes to Clark Gregg ad S.H.E.I.L.D. Agent Phil Coulson who steals every scene he's in and really comes alive as a full character here. 


   Everything else I haven't mentioned is fine or irrelevant, the two P.S. scenes made me cry out for another movie fast, and the next couple years of Marvel Studios are going to be some very good ones. Go. See. This. Sh*t. It gets a hyped up A. 

The Raven (2012)

...Okay I'm not going to lie I got really lazy here. I saw this when it came out and now it's been a while and frankly I remember nothing about the movie except for the fact that it had no redeemable qualities and was a gigantic piece of crap.
So skip it. 

Cabin in the Woods (2012)

                This movie is defiantly worth seeing. Avoid trailers, avoid people who have seen it, just go see it. Is it the best movie ever? No. But it’s not like anything you’ve seen before, it has twist after twist after twist and with the writing manages to be effective and entertaining, turning classic horror clichés over on their side and making an entirely original movie.

                While I don’t want to spoil the plot lemme just tell you the basic set up so you don’t write it off immediately (However if you have decided to see it stop reading now and just go see it), Cabin in The Woods is about a group of young collage students go to stay in a cabin in the woods. Simple enough? Well it’s clearly established from the very beginning that some large organization has been setting this up for a while and plans to do something to them.

                Beyond that I won’t say much, it’s incredibly original and visually superb. It doesn’t use a lot of effects but it all looks very cool and colorful and fun. That’s a good way to describe this movie for what it’s worth; fun. This movie is just plain crazy and at times silly fun. The tone constantly shifts from serious to funny to crazy back to sad to serious round the corner back to crazy town.  An 8 minute segment toward the end of the movie is my new favorite action seen in any movie ever.

                I don’t wanna spoil anymore, it’s great just go see it. B+

Ya whatever weekend..

So I  ended up not seeing anything new this weekend, I saw 21 Jumpstreet again which was still incredible and you should defiantly go see it.
But if your looking for something new.... eh. 
Battle Royale finally came out officially in the States. Just go pick up a DVD of that. Its better than the Hunger Games. 

It's a classic ya'll got to check it out, 

If not just enjoy the following puppy:

Look at his widdle face! 

21 Jumpstreet (2012)

 

   Ahhh yes. A comedy. Comedies are tricky. Especially really really great ones like this. Ya see while i can explain the plot and mention a few vaguely good things about the movie, if i get to specific i'll  ruin some of the best jokes. For example i can tell you that there are a lot of jokes about how much highscool stereotypes have changed, but if i tell you how the film approaches is it i ruin the joke and you  won't enjoy the movie as much. 


   And that's not something i'm willing  to do, becuase this movie is absolutely hilarious. The title comes from the 1980's television show, and this movie poses itself as a sequel to that show. 21 Jumpstreet is an address where a new breed of undercover cops is being formed, younger cops who look like highschool students. They go undercover in, you guessed it, highschools to try and stop crimes that would be difficult for people who can't get in close. Such is the case in  this movie, only a few short years out of graduating highschool themselves Channing Tatum and Jonah Hill graduate police academy in hope of glory for doing the right thing, and upon making their first real arrest one of them fails too catch a crook, while the other fails to read out the Miranda Rights. I'll let you guess whose who. Since the two are still rookies the chief decides they'd be perfect for the Jumpstreet program, which requires them to look and act like highschool students. They report to their new captain played by Ice Cube and are sent to track down the suppliers of a new synthetic drug that has rather lethal side effects if mis- used.


   And that's pretty much it, the movie is funny as all hell. And for a comedy like this it has some really out there jokes that seem like extreme risks but totally work. I attribute a lot of this to the two leads, carrying every scene with grace, and Jonah Hill's hand behind the writing elevates the often groan worthy jokes to genuine moments of comedic genius.


Beyond that i can't say much just go see it, it doesn't rely heavily on the original but  fans will see a few jokes spiced in here or there. A-. 

Silent House (2012)

 
   Ugh.. this is kind of a tough one. Silent House does so many cool things, and for once has a pretty original gimmick. Good acting and a little good writing too. The problem with it is that the plot works  up until the last four or five minutes of the movie, and if you hadn't already guessed what was to happen you still won't be very surprised. However it does so much right it might still be worth watching.


   Let's back up; Silent House is a low budget horror movie starring Elizabeth Olsen, younger sister to the Olsen twins, and revolves around two central gimmicks which can be described as 'real fear in real time' and 'one perspective'. The first is quiet clever (I mean this is a remake so NONE of it's clever but in general i mean, it's a cool idea) the movie doesn't ever change scene or cut away from whatever is happening, the movie is about 85 minutes long, and the events that take place in the movie happen in exactly that time. The camera is always rolling and displays all the events in real time. That's where the other gimmick comes in, the camera is always on Elizabeth Olsen and isn't mounted on anything to keep it steady making a shaky cam effect without the tie of having to make the person holding the camera a character. The way the movie is shot follows how Olsen moves and feels, adjusting focus to thing around her that she isn't focused on, shaking as if strained while shes running, and even looking around the room every time she looks around the room. 


   Those alone are reason enough to see the movie, they're cool and creative and kind of scary you've probably never seen before. In fact i recommend you stop reading this right now and just go see it. If your not a horror buff you'll enjoy it just fine. Go on. Go. Buy a ticket and enjoy. Right now.


   Okay are you all gone? Good. NOW here's the movies biggest problem. Ya see the movie uses it gimmicks really well, and it since it sticks with the main characters the whole time it has a lot of twists and turns that maybe make you question her sanity and you start to wonder if maybe her mind is playing tricks on her, which while not very original is nice enough. However *SPOILER ALERT * they completely squander it by the end and i felt like the movie had been walking the line so well up until the last four or five minutes when the whole plot falls apart and your left with a rather unsatisfying ending. 


   It's not a bad movie, and it does enough right to warrant a look,  but i can't promise you'll enjoy it.


Its a  C. 

John Carter (2012)

   

   When i first saw teaser and concept images for this version of John Carter i was weary at best. Disney has reliable track record of making things like this well, but never glorious or epic. They rely heavily on  CG and old school Kung Fu movie wire work, which was also kind of a red flag becuase movies like this often turn out looking a little dull and a lot hard to buy into. Logically since I was so excited that a classic sci-fi novel over a hundred years old was finally getting it's shot at a movie, i read the first book that this movie is loosely based on ; A Princess of Mars. And let me tell you two things right off the bat, that book is  amazing and R rated. It plays out differently from the PG-13 adaptation i saw on screen. 

   But it still turned out as an epic sci-fi adventure. 

   So let's give a brief run of the plot and some of the changed made from the book; an ex solider in a post civil war america is completely down on his luck and spends half his time avoiding the law and half his time searching for a legendary cave of gold that no one believes exists. So of course whilst one day avoiding said law he stumbles into said magical cave. Sadly when someone appears out of no where Carter gets startled, which is normal when someone appears out of nowhere, and shoots him. Turns out he some sorta alien guy and his dying breathes send Carter through a portal to Barsoom, also known as Mars and is dropped into a war between two different factions of humans humanoid martians as immediately sides with the pretty girl and her scientific people who are being oppressed. Now it's worth noting that the main alien looking species are the Tharks, who are tall and green with four arms, who want nothing to do with this war but occasionally get dragged in when the fighting hits to close to their cities. They have a much bigger role in the book with their own internal conflict but the movie can only be so long. 

  That's basically it, since John Carter is from earth his physiology (Sciencey stuff I know) makes him able to jump great distances and gives him effective super strength becuase the gravity is so lessened. Which is really cool, they end up using a lot of very practical effects to make him and his jumping very real and really adds to the cool factor. If they had green screened all his jumps it would've ruined the movie. 

   The movie ends up working, but not without a few bumps; As far as heroes go John Carter is as bland as they come with no long term motivation for anything, but the movie insisted on wasting a solid fifteen minutes of an already two and a half hour long movie crow baring in a terrible back story about his family dying while he was fighting in the war. It's out of place ans useless but it doesn't linger through the second half. I guess to make it a blockbuster writers also jammed in villainous characters from later books that are like guardian gods of making sure everything happens how it's supposed to. Like in the Adjustment Bureau, but while that was the whole plot of that movie, they aren't really apart of the book and i feel like they could have made the main villain better if they had focused less on trying to have both, even though both characters are acted superbly. The fact of the matter is all the acting is great, even the voices and faces of the CGI Tharks who look as good as the blue creatures from Avatar, except more interesting. The real stand out in the cast is Lynn Collins as the Princess Dejah Thoris, who is the best character in the book, so it makes sense that she'd have the strongest on screen presence. Taylor Kitsch isn't bad as John Carter, in fact he fits the character quiet well. But i didn't always buy into him being as selfish as he was supposed to be. IN the first half of the story he doesn't want anything to do with the conflict he just wants to get home but i never really see that on Kitsch's face. 

   These however are all little complaints, the movie is a sci-fi epic like few others and i hope they continue the series into the later books. It has an interesting twist that clearly leads into more stories so why couldn't they? 

It gets an A- from me, definitely go and see it and love it. 

See it now before it's in theaters mini reviews ATM (2012)- The Hunter (2012)

   First things first, to watch these movies right now you have to pay roughly 8 to 10 dollars (like the price of a movie ticket) and stream them or download them through some digital internet means. The long and the short of it is that ATM probably isn't worth 10 bucks unless your lookin for a fun night at home with a few good friends. The Hunter on the other hand is more than worth it. Here's why;

   ATM is a smaller budget horror movie that seems to have pinned its hopes on making all the money back on this little pre-release. To the film's credit it's kind of original: After leaving an office Christmas party two best friends and a girl that one of them really likes have to stop at an ATM. In a spectacular showing of their collective genius they stop at a small ATM machine building, (you may never have seen one but you swipe your card to get into a little glass room with two ATMs in it and usually a table to write checks. ) and are immediately approached by a mysterious hooded man who shows his dominance by beating a hobo to death. 


   From then on it's pretty much that "Saw-like" plot of crazy mystery murderer man torturing these three young whipper snappers as they slowly freeze to death trying to find a way out and to get help. Some of what it does is original and kinda interesting, and even has some decent cheap acting by none other than Josh Peck of Drake & Josh fame. All and all it's not a bad cheap thriller, but an ambiguous ending and a lack of any non-standard characters growth make this, in my professional opinion, not  worth ten bucks. 


Probably a D+ and a frowny face :( 

   The Hunter, starring Willam Defoe, on the other hand isn't a cheap and lifeless thriller.  Plot summery-a-go-go; Willam Defoe is a hunter who's specializes in tracking rare animals for well playing clients. Is it legal? 
...maaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyybe. He gets a job to hunt an animal called the Tasmanian Tiger which most people believe is extinct but a few people have claimed to have seen very recently in a rural part of what I think is Australia (but who knows?) and begins a journey that will emotionally affect him and his family forever!
How sweet is that? ....wait, wait, wait i'm sorry that's not what happens, i must be mistaken. He spends a lot of time alone in the woods setting traps and ripping animals guts out trying to set lure in the tiger. And then he goes back to his house?

   Oh ya! That's what i was talking about before, ya ya now i got it. For some reason his living arrangements find him in the house of a researcher and his family. Sadly the researcher has been missing for sometime after he went off looking for the same mystery tiger. He and the family have a few moments and he spends a lot of time bonding with the kids and helping the mother readjust, and that's all well and good and dandy. Come to think of it this film does an excellent job of shifting the tone between Defoe with the kids and Defoe alone in the woods. It makes the scenes with the family more affecting and real, while the scenes of him tracking a myth in the woods very tense and serious.


   It's a cool effin movie and you probably won't see anything this original or realistic for a while. Defoe is a massive talent and shines in this role as a semi- legal poacher that's supremely focused on his work almost to a fault. Shots of the beautiful landscape aboslutely astonish your eyeballs, and the movie keeps twisting and twisting till it needs a breaking point. 


I hope you enjoy it as much as i do, B+